For the uninitiated, here’s ways of identifying & steering clear of Bongs…
Observation #1 – While in Kolkata ask anybody where Rabindra Sadan is, if you are looked upon with that contemptuous gaze, Voila!! there’s your man!! An average Bong almost swears by the bard who incidentally happens to be Asia’s first Nobel Laureate!!
Observation #2 – Take a random sampling of teenagers across the city. Do you see a lissome lass & you are gearing up for an impromptu intro (The Bong’s beauty is stuff of legends)? Hold it, does she have one of those colourful amulets wrapped around her upper Humerus, left exposed by virtue of that seductive sleeveless top? Beware, my friend change your bearings immediately, chances are her mother is trailing her & is about to pounce on you.
Observation #3 – Do you happen to see people deep in concentration playing chess amid traffic chaos…..well, you don’t need any more confirmation!!
Observation #4 – Talk Cricket…does every alternate word sound like “D-A-D-A”?…take guard & be careful of the statistics that you mention henceforth! The average Bong may not be having his elementary education but he is sure to belt out esoteric stuff which to most ordinary mortals least interested in the game will sound like hieroglyphics.
Observation #5 – Never ever make the unpardonable mistake of discussing football with a Bong…chances are he is ready to draw blood over the slightest difference in opinion. Have heard of incidents where people have gone directly to Yuva Bharati Krirangan–(yes, that’s the Bong’s Estadio Azteca) after performing the last rites of their father!!!
Observation #6 – This sign on a hoarding says it all.
Fish – Rs. 400/month.
Mobile Charges – Rs. 99/month.
Observation #7 – Talk Politics…but be prudent enough to be on the Right(Left) side of the fence.
Well, I guess that’s not bad for a start….am in the observing & learning process myself! The idiosyncracies of the Bong keep changing with each passing day…!!
LOL..!!the day doesn’t seem to be too far when u’d be beaten up on the streets, i guess… u know, bongs r a pretty hot-headed race!!!
Physical aggression is one thing that does not come easily to the Bong, my dear!!
Haha!
Funny..! Mista K’s observation of the nuances of The BONG!
You meant RObindra Sodan, didn’t you?
😛
Well written and well classified.
But just give a food for thought
I hate sweets, a Coffee drinker, Aesthetically and Scientifically Challenged. Never did drugs life, I am an anti communist anti Marxist.. Hate Maoism. Never carried ajhola in life, never wore batik.. have taste for Louis Phillipes and formals. Yes i do were a lot of fab India( which whole India does, and it has more north campus touch to it .. its very very Delhite ), I hate haggling with taxi and auto rickshaw wallas.. hate cheap foot path bargains. Hate second hand and pirated books
I hate wasting time on sleep, a spend thrift which i believe is not a quintessential Bong Character. Lackadaisical only at times..stand tall at 6’2″. And most importantly i am not really fond of fish
Non of them are Bong in nature, but i am still a bong at heart body mind and soul.
See you cant genaralise all bongs.. not always
@bagheera: i guess so..Robindro Sodon would have been better anytime..!!
@abhigyan: i have a question for you..! if you are not what you really claim to be…then where is that bong element in you? and neither am I being generic..!! am I?
I am a bong because i believe i am one.. the language is quintessentially a part of me, it runs in my veins.. there is a sense of belongingness..u dont need to have certain straits to be a bengali.. its just needs to meta -physical .. that pulls u towards it
And most important: I AM BENGALI BY BIRTH
hahaha
So am I…& quite proud to be one! There’s a thin line between the Bong & the Bengali & it is the former that I have brought to the fore without any sarcasm for the latter!!
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